Changing relationships over time?

Since the start of the human civilization, humans have been social animals and love to be in groups and lived as groups, possibly this is the behavior we all got from our ancestor the Apes.

As humans started to grow their own food and domesticate animals, they wanted support and help from each other. The families were large and they all lived together under the same roof.

I definitely did not want to sound like I am taking back everyone into times and giving a lecture on how humans started living and other historical events. Relationships and culture has always fascinated me and I wondered what it meant in the past and how this is changing with time.

So what is relationship? It could be just connection between two or more individuals and objects. English dictionaries have so many definitions about this word “Relationship”. I wanted to understand what human relationships meant yesterday, today and tomorrow. In this understanding I wanted to just take three key relationships, family, friends and firm or workplace. My observations, experiences and learning from the last many years is what I have tried to put in this blog.

Family –

Brother, sister, parents, grand parents, uncles, aunts and cousins form the closest network or relationship in a person’s life as he/she comes into this world. In the yester years all these relationships were under one roof as they were dependent on each other to earn, work, cook, protect and grow from generation to the other. As time passed by we started becoming nuclear and everyone moved out the unit in search of work, food and newer relationship. Today’s family mostly consists of a man, a woman and may be kids (as long as they are not ready for a boarding school or a teenager). Saying that ,I know there are a good number of families where generations stay together, but this is on a decline. Members of the family meet when there is a vacation, or someone is need. The physical distances between them have been minimized by technology like phone, skype, facebook or other social connections. Kids spend most of their time with outsiders than family members as they grow up in daycares, then boarding schools and then colleges. Similarly elderly have moved from homes to old age homes or elderly supported communities. What is likely to happen in the future is only one of the two things. People will start to get closer and dependency on one another for mental happiness will be the essence. Family may just be entities, that are connected through each other by technology and warmth, feelings, care and love will be transmitted through words and emotions.

Friends –

Friends are family that we choose. A friend is one who tells you what you truly portray as an individual and what you are not. He/she is not biased and always there for you during your thick and thin. This is how I would define a friend and what friendship to me has been.

Since times, people who assisted you, been with you, helped you beyond the family members have been regarded as extended family or friends. Even today there are places in the world where smaller colonies of people stay together where everyone knows everyone by name, and are there for one another during thick and thin.

As time moved in friends were people that one got associated at work or around ones home. As education got formalized, friends were individuals who studied with you or helped you during the time you spent at the educational institute. Colleague became friends too and soon people with you met once or may be never became the electronic form of friends, thanks to social networking options which helps you to keep in touch with them as an when needed.

So has the definition of friendship changed with time or are we in the race to just make sure we have added long list of friends to our social profiles and then call it “Networking”.

Has the essence of “Friend in need is a friend indeed” got diminished?

As I look into the future, the friend space of relationship seems be again headed towards electronic way where friends will be made based on common interests and professional growth.

Firm/Workplace –

“Work is worship” is how I was always told during my tender growing up days. I was fascinated by the fact that people spend their whole life in one firm or workplace with sincerity and integrity. At the beginning of my career, I had come across people who had generations serving and working for the same firm. As times changed and opportunities grew, people moved from one opportunity to another i.e. one firm to another. Individuals moved up on the Maslow’s hierarchy of needs chart, creating many more firms and so increasing more and more opportunities around the globe.

As I see in the future, the association between an individual and firm is likely to shorten and it will just be so much harder to contain individual’s aspirations and needs. What is to be seen is how the firms will be able to hold on to talented and much needed skilled resources? Also will machines or automated systems replace skilled human resources?

These aspects of relationships have been always been the toughest and most intricate. I am writing this blog to generate comments and thoughts from folks who have other experiences and share some of these thoughts or may be different.

How do we inculcate "The Good" from others?

It is we individuals who make up a family, an organization, a society and finally a nation. You all would imagine what I am upto now and what am I trying to convey.  Recently I had been on a trip to Singapore and there were so many things that we all can learn from that nation of 4 million people.

An island nation no more than the Los Angeles County in terms of area, can boast to be one of the most prosperous at nations of the modern times. The moment I landed at the Changi International Airport, I started to compare this fabulous airport with the ones that I have seen in the US, Dubai, Kuala Lampur etc. Unfortunately I could not compare this to any US airport.

When I reached the immigration center, it was delightful to see that place, a huge area with a giant statue. Even better, when you are greeted so politely by the immigration officer welcoming you to the country and a big smile at 3:00am in the morning. This shows how much they care for the visitors.

My week passed by with work and still I was trying to find out issues, limitations and again I was comparing it to the more developed countries of the west.

There were taxi stands along with bus stands, where people queued up to wait for their change to hop on the nicely maintained cabs. The best part, the charges were based on the meter, no tipping or any extras. The rates changes based on the time of the day, how may toll roads did your drive take and which part of the country are your heading to. Another interesting fact that I learned from my friend and folks I met, the whole country discourages on tipping which is a huge thing in the west and now catching up rapidly in India. So you pay what is billed.

Interestingly the only part of the country that was not well kept up and possibly seems chaotic was a place called “Little India”. This houses all sorts of Indian stores, eateries, not to forget the jewelry stores. People crossed the street anyplace they like, honking cars, over crowed streets, shopkeepers calling out load to pull in the customers.

This is where you can find Indian origin tourist from through the globe flocking to do their shopping and the favorite among them is “Mustafa”. This is an enormous store which practically keeps everything that one can ask for.

Thinking through the 18 hour long flight back home, I was happy to learn so much from this place, the people and the policies. Can we model these in any other developing countries, even states, even cities? Are we open to accept something good, way and means which improves everyone’s life and living standard.